November 6, 2002: Class Notes Class Notes Profiles: Dads
count big for kids Helping
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Dads
count big for kids Tonight one of every three children in the U.S. will go to sleep in a
home without a father. Those kids, on average, are significantly more
likely to experience poverty, commit violent crimes, be suspended from
school or drop out, and become victims of child abuse or neglect. Roland
Warren 83 is trying to change those troubling statistics. Warren,
who took over as president of the National Fatherhood Initiative last
year, understands well what it means to grow up without a dad his
parents divorced when he was a youngster. When first asked to be president of NFI, a nonprofit organization that
encourages a society-wide reversal of the absent-father trend, he said
Not now. Warren, a psychology major at Princeton who earned
an M.B.A. at the Wharton School, worked as a financial consultant at Goldman
Sachs in Philadelphia. But he soon realized that you can always
make a buck, but you cant always make a difference. The percentage of children growing up without a father in the home has
increased, notes Warren. Today, 24 million kids live in fatherless homes.
As a proportion of the population, out-of-wedlock births are a bigger
problem in the black community than they are in the white community, says
Warren. Seven out of 10 black kids are born to a single mother. But whites
are still responsible for the majority of out-of-wedlock births, he says. Divorce, of course, also contributes to fatherlessness, he says. Kids
crave structure and nurturing, and divorce makes it more difficult to
deliver both. Data that foreshadowed about the impact of father absence on kids have
been around for years, says Warren. But people didnt want
to talk about it. Based in Gaithersburg, Maryland, NFI works to encourage all kinds of
dads: those incarcerated or in the military, fathers who are divorced,
noncustodial never-married fathers, and even married dads who just want
to become better parents. The organization promotes awareness through
public service announcements; provides curricula and training to community-based
fatherhood programs; and develops and distributes books, videos, and other
resources for fathers. NFIs program for dads in prison most of whom grew up without
fathers gives inmates an opportunity to talk openly about their
own issues of rejection and neglect, which most men find difficult to
discuss, says Warren. He should know. Theres still pain, he says, even four
years after his fathers death. Growing up in Toledo, Ohio, Warren
and his three siblings knew where my father was, says Warren,
but there was limited contact beyond special occasions. Warren eventually
realized that if I was going to move forward, I was going to have
to forgive my dad. Some men respond to their own fathers absence by becoming highly
involved in their childrens lives, says Warren. Thats
the route I took. Warren married Yvette M. Lopez-Warren 85,
a family physician in Abington, Pennsylvania, and they have two boys,
Jamin, 20, and Justin, 17. But theres another path, he says: to
pretend that your absence doesnt affect your kids and to become
indifferent to staying involved in their lives. In the end, he says, NFIs work is about connecting the hearts of fathers to their kids. By K.F.G. For more information: rwarren@fatherhood.org; www.fatherhood.org
Helping local kids Josh Morris 99 pushing climbing to new heights in northern Thailand After a year teaching English in northern Thailand through Princeton-in-Asia,
Josh Morris 99 discovered that he would rather climb rocks than
do anything else. At the same time, he has figured out a way to help support
a new life for local kids in the northern Thai city of Chiang Mai. These young flower vendors were always monkeying around on the
wall, says Morris, who majored in art history and has been climbing
since he was a teenager. Finally, I threw a harness on this five-year-old
girl, Gaeow, and let her climb for real. She was a natural. Many of the kids like Gaeow work all day and late into the night, selling
flowers and other goods on the street to earn money for their families.
The job leaves no time for school or much of a life for the kids, many
of whom come from hill tribes around Chiang Mai. Building on the interest of Gaeow and others, Morris plans to offer free
clinics to local youngsters and take on the most skilled as paid apprentices.
The apprentices will work reasonable afternoon and weekend hours
and, he hopes, be able to abandon late-night vending and attend school.
Eventually, Morris says, these children would become full-time guides. A few might compete on the growing Asian rock-climbing circuit or farther afield, says Morris. Theyll develop a skill, learn English, and be exposed to travelers in a different way than selling things on the street. By Oakley Brooks 99
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